Silence is natural and gives both parties a chance to process the conversation. Instead of rushing to fill the silence with more small talk, take a moment to reflect on what’s been said and where the conversation could go next. A simple open-ended question or a genuine compliment can be a great way to gracefully resume the conversation and steer it in a positive direction. Here are some tips to help you navigate casual conversations, without the awkwardness. Making small talk is the art of engaging in light conversation.
Your interview runs over and someone’s trying to get into your conference room. You get distracted and lose your train of thought. You forget everything you’ve practiced and have zero things to say. Figure out what you’re worth by using a salary calculator and reading this article and this one.
In this article, I’ll share how I learned to become a better conversationalist. Even if you consider yourself an introvert, I believe it’s less about personality and more about practice. Small talk is a muscle you can train, and one that leads to friendships, adventures, and memories you’ll carry for life.
Easy Conversation Starters
They’re balanced, which means both of you are talking, asking questions, and exposing bits of yourselves. Otherwise, the whole encounter will feel less like an enjoyable chat and more like a formal interrogation. Learning how to get better at small talk might not seem like much of a conversational superpower. Arguably everyone’s least favorite part of socializing, surface-level chitchat can be awkward, draining, and impossible to avoid—but that’s all the more reason why it’s a skill worth mastering. One of the biggest mistakes people make in phone interviews is not sounding energetic and excited enough.
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People can tell if you genuinely care about them. When I’m in my flow state, I get to a place where I can connect with a random stranger. It starts with being curious and trying to learn something new. Here are my top tips for how to actually make small talk that goes somewhere and leads to productive, natural interactions. I recently went to a large celebratory event and only knew the busy host. I noticed another guest taking her time at the snack table and introduced myself.
Talking about the immediate surroundings and what’s going on around you can be a great way to quickly find common ground with someone new. This could also be something you noticed on your way to the location, an interesting piece of decor in the room, or even the music playing in the background. When you reframe your interactions like this, you don’t end up in the trap of looking for approval. Show that you trust people by assuming they have the best intentions and that anyone can be a potential friend.
With only your voice to carry you through, you want to make sure everything you’re saying is clear and concise—so catch yourself when you start to ramble or chatter a mile a minute. Browse their website, Google them to gather some recent news updates, read their employee testimonials on other sites (like The Muse!), and scroll through their social media. Get a sense of not just what your specific role would entail and what the team does, but the company’s history, mission, and overall vibe.
- In the interest of being more outgoing, don’t be someone you aren’t.
- The truth is, it’s a skill, and it takes practice to be good at it.
- I’ve come to realize that everything meaningful in my life started with a simple conversation.
- Maybe I’ll challenge myself to see how many new people I can have a deep conversation with.
If they’re doing this, either they’re dealing with technical difficulties or they want to refocus the conversation. You’ll want to transition with them so everything you say is clearly heard and understood. Ideally you’ll actually pick up the phone when the interviewer calls. But in case you can’t for whatever reason, you’ll want to make the best impression you can offline—and this means setting up a professional voicemail message. At home, this may mean locking yourself in a room that’s away from family, roommates, or pets.
I’m fanforus online passionate about this topic because the ability to strike up a conversation with anyone, anywhere, is one of the most useful skills you can develop. We are happiest when we feel like we belong to a tribe. In the interest of being more outgoing, don’t be someone you aren’t. I find people have nothing to say because they don’t seem to have any interests.
Going into any situation with judgments about how pointless or agonizing it will be automatically influences your attitude and how you show up. If you enter a networking event focused on how much you hate chatting, then guess what? The event will likely feel excruciating 20 minutes in. If your phone interview is actually with a recruiter who found you via LinkedIn or another source, that’s awesome! And if they interrupt you, stop talking to let them finish before speaking again.
“Small talk is about being interested, not interesting,” Abrahams says. “You can also express gratitude by saying something like, ‘Thanks for meeting me—I know you’re so busy and I missed you! These small but thoughtful comments help open the door for an easy, authentic, and positive interaction. Want to learn how to get better at small talk (and actually enjoy it)? Here’s what the best conversationalists do differently—and how they stand out, according to communication experts.
Often, it’s about reading between the lines and listening to what they’re not saying to get a good understanding of the type of person they are, what they want and how I can supply that need. Asking questions is the secret ingredient to interesting conversations. Stay away from yes-or-no questions and instead start with easy questions that feel natural. Just make sure to listen for an interesting comment to explore and build upon. If you spend the week anticipating and worrying because you know you will feel uncomfortable, you’ve set yourself up for failure. Remember why you are going—to celebrate a friend on their special day, to meet others who share your interest or to connect with your coworkers.
Saying “’Sup” or not making it clear it’s you speaking will immediately make the interviewer question your professionalism and communication skills. Being afraid of talking on the phone is normal, so if that’s your biggest worry the best thing you can do is practice—over and over again until nothing surprises you. And try reading this article on overcoming phone interview phobia, this one on becoming a “phone person”, and this one on refocusing after you get distracted.
They may still be conducting interviews and thus have no updates for you, but checking in keeps you top of mind when they go to narrow down candidates. I look forward to hearing from you about next steps, but please let me know if there’s any other information I can provide in the meantime. By the way, please do not eat or chew gum during your interview.
If you want to master the art and get in on all these benefits, I got you. Read on for seven ways to ace more casual conversations. To address this issue, Hinge unveiled “Convo Starters,” a feature powered by AI that provides personalized tips for initiating conversations. Self-awareness is crucial when you’re talking on the phone.